A Day Full of Rehearsing, Only to See How Far I Have Left to Go (2/6/2020)

Seriously, I need to start writing this blog posts sooner in the night; yeah I have to be to work a half hour later nowadays, but that should mean I’m getting up to actually do something with my day, not sleep even later. Whatever, that being said today was actually a productive day for me, surprisingly enough. I was supposed to meet up with my personal trainer at 11AM, but he actually cancelled the lesson and asked if we could do it another time; honestly thank god because I was not able to function at the beginning of the day. I mean I originally woke up around 10:30, hearing Andrew and Julian talking, but I quickly passed back out, waking up around 1:30; aka I got a good 10+ hours of sleep last night… wowzers. I woke up to a text from Natalie, asking if I had booked the space for us to rehearse today, which I hadn’t, so I quickly got around to getting that done before anything else- we were booked from 4-5, and then from 5:30-6:30. By the time I had gotten ready and was all showered, it was past 3PM so I had to hurry out. Julian was having a read-through of his play tonight, which is super exciting, but I couldn’t worry about that for now. I mean I literally spent from when I woke up to right as I left, running and re-running over my lines for the part of the scene we were doing, just making sure I had everything ready; I wanted to start memorizing sooner, but that never happened because well… the edible. I ended up catching the 4 uptown towards Manhattan, switching to the B which dropped me off a bit closer to the studio. It was just turning 4PM, so I told Natalie I was here right as I ran into her at the base of the building, and the two of us took the stairs up to Simple Studios, before finding our way into the room I rented out.

As for our two hours of rehearsal, honestly I thought they went pretty well. I was trying to go in the opposite direction of where I was last time, trying to actually be much more suave and charming, and altogether it felt good to get it on its feet. Again we did take the 30 minutes in between our sessions just to go to Pret, mostly because I had not eaten yet today and needed food, but then it was back to it. By 6:30 I honestly felt much more confident in the scene, and the two of us made our way over to class; Natalie mentioned she wanted to go first today so we had more time to work, and I was absolutely okay with that. Around 7PM class finally began, with Natalie and I getting up to rehearse our scene in front of the class- or perform it, but it’s a work in progress, so more of an open rehearsal, you know? Lines stayed strong and I thought the scene all in all went alright. Then Jayd began “how did that feel?” Soon enough he was poking holes into our work again, which is great but also fuck, and said that I was playing a character again; a habit that I really seem to have ingrained in me at this point, and need to get it out of my system. But also, think about the language I just used to describe Nicky- I was playing him as this charming, suave guy; I was PLAYING him. I need to bring more vulnerability, more ME to Nicky, to really make this scene work. I mean it’s frustrating, not being where you want to be, but I also think it’s exciting because I have so much space to move forward and explore. Now Jayd did have us do the first, 90 seconds or so, just to really hammer down what he’s looking for us to do here. Honestly, it felt much more awkward between the two of us, in the best way possible, because it felt honest and true and natural! It’s exciting! And now I’m finally starting to be myself at least a little bit, and am bringing more than a character I created to show. “You are far more interesting than your good ideas”.

The other two scenes that went today both went quite well, and with Jayd cutting the class around 9:50, not feeling all too hot, it was finally time to make it home. Now I got on the next 3 that arrived, but much to my dismay we were held at Penn for a good 20+ minutes, with me ending up heading over and catching the downtown 1, just so I could get a move on back home! I was planning on transferring at the World Trade Center and walking to Fulton to catch the 4, but right as we arrived at 14th St. a downtown 3 pulled up, so I traded cars and beforelong I was on my way home to Brooklyn. It was raining all tonight, but thankfully I actually had my umbrella with me tonight, so walking home was not a problem. I made it home a little after 11PM, and with me coming in to Julian being passed out and Andrew on the phone, I chose to take that time to actually make some food that Andrew and I got after grocery shopping on Tuesday. I just made some chicken fried rice, which thankfully took no time at all, and beforelong I was eating my food on the couch, with Andrew coming into the living room and chatting for a little while before heading off to bed. I even cracked open one of my ciders, because of course! The night ended with me planning on writing yesterday and today’s blog posts around 12:30AM or so, but it’s already 5:08 so that obviously didn’t end up happening. I did however, get distracted watching random YouTube videos, and then losing a couple of games of League, but at least I’m finally finished. Even broke the 1k word count somehow, thank god. Alright, I need sleep, I got work tomorrow. Goodnight y’all~

Until next time,


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