This was it; today I auditioned for an acting class, taught by a gentleman named Jayd, who was recommended to me by Chernin, a fellow server at Eataly. To tell you the truth, 2019 was just… such a terrible year for me, when it came to me legitimately pursuing my passion and achieving higher heights. I mean don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t all bad, right? I performed in an acting showcase, signed with an Agent, and got new headshots, which I love so much. Those were such incredible first steps and I was so excited! But as the months progressed, I began plateauing; unable to climb any higher than I was at the start of the year. Of course this was because of many factors, but the fact of the matter was… I was in a weak mental state, and it dragged me downwards in a spiral that took me quite a long time to recover from. I hate using my ex as an excuse for what I didn’t do properly, so I will not do that; it wasn’t her fault I went too hard in the relationship. It wasn’t her fault she wished for her own happiness and ended things; break-ups happen. How I handled the situation, though understandable to a point, was not great, and my life truly began crumbling. The break-up, and how I acted after the relationship had ended, was just the straw that broke the camel’s back; looking back now, I can see just how much pressure I was putting on her. When you attempt to balance your entire life and happiness on one stick, one support beam, and continue piling more and more on without properly building more support for the exponential weight being added, once that beam breaks, everything else comes crumbling down. I wasn’t happy at my job, I wasn’t secure when it came to my finances, and overall I was just incredibly stressed; choosing to ignore everything and continue to pile all of it onto my relationship caused so much strain that of course the beam snapped. If I had faced my unhappiness, looked for more, healthier outlets to fix my problems, maybe the relationship would’ve been more stable. But I can’t change the past; all I can do is grow from the experience and look to move forward. However, because everything came tumbling down, any structure that I had built on such a precarious base had crashed and broken; leaving me to collect the pieces and start from scratch.
Halfway through 2019 I more or less had to start over, and build myself back up to where I am now. With that being said, I’m working to create a stronger base in which to build off of. I have a good group of friends, along with two great roommates that are friends, I have a stable job that I’m good at and where I’m making money; the next steps are to begin to improve myself, and I’m taking steps to do that. First it began with starting personal training sessions; next it’s this class. After that? Well… let’s start with these two, shall we? Okay, putting all this rambling aside, today was a very informative day, that I think I needed. So I woke up at noon, feeling a bit exhausted still from not getting all that much sleep last night. After laying in bed for a good hour, I ended up falling back asleep, waking up around 2PM, laying in bed for couple minutes before finally getting up to shower. I was definitely running a bit behind, because I still needed to print out a headshot before I headed to this audition, but what are you gonna do. As I showered, I continued to run through my monologues, a bit nervous about the second one I was doing- I have the one I did for the showcase basically engraved in my memory at this post- but it was coming along pretty well. After shaving and washing my face, I started to get dressed before I took a minute to print out my resume and get it trimmed down so I could staple it to my headshot when I got that printed out. I chatted with Andrew briefly after I was dressed, grabbing my things and making my way out the door. I ended up catching the 3:10 4 train or something heading to Manhattan, transferring to the C at Fulton and taking that up to 23rd St. I mean there were better options I could’ve taken, but with the amount of time I might have been waiting for the trains to arrive at the station… I wasn’t going to risk it. By the time I got to 23rd St., walking to the building where Quick Color is located, it was already past 3:45; mind you, the audition is at 4PM. I took the elevator up to the fifth floor, chatting briefly with one of the gentlemen in the room, before being told to take a seat as they printed out my picture. A good 10 minutes later and it’s finished; thank god. I made sure to text Jayd saying that I was just running a bit late, and ended up arriving at the building where the audition was being held at 4:10. After texting Jayd and being told to head on up, I took the elevator to the second floor- Simple Studios- and immediately recognized the fact that I had actually been here like, one other time at least.
Trying to figure out where Jayd was, he poked his head out of the room and greeted me; we shook hands and headed into one of the rooms, with me taking a seat after handing him my resume and just kind of chatting about my background as an actor. He seems like a genuinely kind person who cares a lot, and I was really curious what he’d say about my monologues. He did like my headshot at least, which I’m very grateful for. Now I got up and performed the two monologues, first the showcase monologue and then the other monologue from “Henry’s Law”, and as I finished the second monologue his response was “How did it go?” I remember Chernin mentioned he does that after every exercise, and I immediately started going into the little nuances of the monologues, and little things I would’ve tweaked. Then he said something I was genuinely not expecting- “I didn’t really see you up there. Are you looking to be a character actor?” It wasn’t a rude question, or said snidely, but more of an honest question. It didn’t make me angry or sad, but I was surprised; I mean I don’t consider myself too much of a character actor, and I never thought of the two monologues as “character pieces”. I mean the first one is a bit heightened, being a monologue made for the showcase, but still… I told him that I didn’t really consider myself a character actor, and he told me that he’d like to see me do a scene or a monologue that was more of a reflection of me; honestly I feel like I have a lot more exploring to do, and that’s both exciting and a bit overwhelming. Nevertheless, I cannot wait to take on the challenge. He then said something else that I wasn’t expecting, which basically boiled down to the fact that he thought I should begin taking movement classes, because if I am serious about this, which I of course am, I need those classes or I will reach a wall. He told me that this class he teaches brings in students basically only from word of mouth, because him and a bunch of other teachers in the city stay low as to weed out a bunch of people who aren’t serious enough with this. I feel like I was given this key to a secret door, which turns out to literally be the entrance to the beginning of the game. I mean that’s not completely true, because at least I already have an Agent, but in many senses it really is. I can finally start moving forward and begin bettering myself, so I can actually… hopefully begin booking. I know I have a long road ahead of me, but talking with Jayd today I cannot wait for things to begin.
And when I say begin, I should say that classes literally begin next week. Apparently there are normally two classes- one at night and one in the early afternoon, but they may be combined so who knows. Basically I’m supposedly going to find out tomorrow, and that will let me know if I’m going to be needing to switch up my schedule a bit more not at Eataly. Thanking Jayd for his time, I headed on out of the Studio and began walking to Penn Station; I still had something I needed to get done before heading on back to Brooklyn. Before catching a subway, I quickly went over to Shake Shack to get a burger and fries, mostly because I had literally eaten nothing all day, and then rode the A up to 59th, getting off at Columbus Circle and taking a seat in the underground shopping area to quickly eat my food. I had a girl working as an on the ground fundraiser try and stop me, but I just said “Nope” and kept walking. After finishing my food, I headed out and over to TJ Maxx, heading up the escalator and over to the acne medicine aisle, attempting to find the facial serum I normally use. Now I didn’t find my usual stuff, because TJ Maxx literally seems to change their entire layout and items every other week I guess, but after getting Maggie’s opinion I bought two different serums before heading back to the subway and catching the A to Fulton. After transferring to the 4, I took that all the way to Brooklyn, making a quick stop at the local Walgreens before heading home. While I was there, I made sure to pick up some paper towels, cookies, and a 12 pack of coke cans, before getting back to the apartment and relaxing. Andrew was the only one home still, and with it already being around 7PM, we were trying to figure out what to do with ourselves. We ended up deciding to watch Moana- incredible movie- but per my request, we headed down to the local liquor store to pick up some whiskey; I wanted to do some drinking tonight. Right as we started watching the movie, Julian got home with his friend Brady, who was staying the night, and the four of us finished Moana before playing some Smash. Before that however, Julian finally finished The Last of Us- heartbreaking ending to the story, but it definitely makes you think- and I quickly hurried off to the bodega to grab a sandwich before getting back and the four of us finally beginning Smashdown- basically playing all of the characters in the game until none are left.
The biggest thing to note is that all three of them are pretty good at Smash… I am not. I definitely played like ass, but thanks to all my years tilting thanks to League, I managed to contain a bunch of the tilt I was having, and pushed onward until the end. There was a bit of a spat towards the very end, but we managed to all be laughing by the end of it, with Andrew even apologizing afterwards for tilting. The three of them began getting ready for bed, and since I had a bit of time, I actually ended up cleaning my bathroom properly, which I’d been needing to do for a while, before hopping on League and playing that for the rest of the night. Ah yes League- somehow after 4.5 years, I still get incredibly tilted thanks to that game. I also watched last week’s episode of My Hero Academia- SUCH a good fucking show holy shit. Now tomorrow it’s back to normal, with me heading off to work for another day at Eataly. The bigger thing is the fact that we’re having a meeting at 8:30AM on Friday, which means I am going to be EXHAUSTED that day. THEN on Saturday I have a second training session prepping for the private dining on the 5th. But on Sunday I’m off, and I’ll finally have my second training session, and frankly I’m really excited for it. For now, it’s already 5:17 and I stalled writing this blog post for far too long, so I definitely need to get some sleep.
Until next time,