So I’ve thankfully had these past two days off, and it’s been pretty similar to how my days off end up going every week- I spend one day basically doing nothing, and then the second day is spent doing more; heading out and having fun, along with running errands. I would talk a lot about what happened on Wednesday, but honestly I literally didn’t get out of bed until like 4PM, finally got up, ordered some pasta from Pick & Eat, and played some League for a while. I messaged Andrew to see if he wanted to hang out, and since he was working earlier in the day, I ended up heading over to his apartment at 8PM, walking on over while listening to some Sister Act; side note, SUCH a good musical. And the fact that I was in it my senior year of college makes me so damn nostalgic when I’m jamming out to the playlist. When I got to Andrew’s, we honestly just spent the next few hours playing some Super Smash Bros Ultimate. Well I say we played, but it was more a giant stomp, with Andrew shitting on me over and over again; but hey, I was having fun, so I really didn’t care. As I finally headed home for the night, I got on Minecraft and played some Pixelmon with Jake for a little while, before hopping on Eddie’s Minecraft server, building some more of the city before getting off, and just watching videos for a while before I finally get ready and fall fast asleep for the night.
Now today, September 5th, I actually had to get up and do things with my day, you know? I texted my voice instructor yesterday, and set up a voice lesson for this morning at 11AM, so no matter when I went to bed, I was going to be up early. Now I set alarms to wake me up at 9:45, but my body was not having that, with me instead getting up at 10:20. I didn’t have much time, so I quickly took a shower, got ready, and started walking over there, unfortunately right after 11AM. I let him know I was going to be late, and headed over, singing along to a past voice lesson to warm myself up. Now the voice lesson today honestly went very well. Jason even complimented my voice, saying “you have a powerhouse voice, that can do anything you want. It’s just…” “Getting it there!” Like having someone say that about my singing voice, especially when it is something that I am insecure about, feels amazing. I mean don’t get me wrong, I love singing, and do it in front of people absentmindedly, but I swear if someone just said to me “stop it you sound awful”, my slight confidence would be shattered. I’ve always felt like so many people I know have incredible voices, and mine will never match up, but now I’m starting to believe it can and it will. It’ll just take time and practice. As the lesson came to a close, I walked back home, made myself a sandwich and relaxed for a bit, before heading back out and downtown. I needed to buy brown dress shoes to go with my suit, and today is the last day I can really get them, because I am most certainly going to be working every day until next Friday; makes sense but damn I am going to be exhausted.
I got on the A and headed downtown, chatting with a woman for a brief moment, because I saw a ball roll under her seat and she thought it was a rat, and then transferred to the B, before heading on over to the closest Men’s Warehouse. Once I got there, I was directed by an employee to where they sold dress shoes, and after a quick consultation, he helped me pick out a solid, darker brown pair of shoes, which cost me just over $100. (Not bad, especially because they were on sale) He asked if there was anything else I needed to buy, to which I was like, “Nope!” “Well that was easy”. Tell me about it. I paid for my new pair of shoes and made my way back home. Now on the train ride back to my apartment, I made the spur of the moment decision to go see Beetlejuice the Musical tonight. I’ve been wanting to see the show for a good bit now, and since I wasn’t doing anything, I mean- why the hell not! I bought my ticket and, once home, spent the next few hours just playing League until it was time to head on out. I put on the new shirt I bought from H&M, a pair of black jeans, and my vans, and made my way down to the theater. Funny enough, I needed to get off at the same stop I was supposed to get off to get to the Men’s Warehouse store! (I wasn’t paying attention, but the stop right after was honestly just as close, maybe even closer so who cares. I got out onto the street, got my ticket, and headed inside to my seat. Now my only qualm is that I’m pretty sure I was given the wrong ticket in my envelope, because I paid for middle mezzanine seats, and got a side mezzanine seat. Still a good view, but I’m pretty sure the seat I was in cost less money, so that’s something I’m gonna have to deal with. No matter that ordeal, soon enough the music began and it was showtime!
Now all I am going to say about the show is… holy fuck it was so good. Like the actor who plays Beetlejuice is incredible, and though the actress who plays the daughter has a different kind of singing voice, which I didn’t think worked a few times, for the most part she was really good. Also the last belt she has at the end of the show??? Holy FUCK it sounds so fucking good. Like genuinely blown away. I had so much fun and was laughing and feeling all the emotions, partly because of the whole “dead mom” thing, throughout the entire show. Such a talented cast, and I really, really want to go see it again. Now I always seem to have this yearning to be on the stage again, as I watch these actors bow at curtain call, but this time it was even more potent. Like don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for where I am, and what I’ve accomplished so far, but I am meant to be on the stage. I’m meant to be acting. It is who I am. I guess I should say not only on the stage, but in film as well, but there is nothing quite like the feeling of a live audience cheering, and the feeling of being with a cast and knowing how incredible what you just accomplished really is. God I miss it so much, and really want to be back in it soon. Like when will I just be able to be an actor full time? When will the auditions flow in, and it’s me on that stage? It’s me on that screen? When will my time arrive? For now all I can do is keep an eye out and keep working; keep honing my craft and never giving up. Now as the curtains came to a close, with most everyone standing up and applauding, it was time for me to head on home to end out my night.
I walked to 59th and caught the A back up to 175th, and I’ve spent the rest of the night, surprisingly enough, not only playing League, but also doing laundry and making dinner! Just some heated up frozen food from Trader Joe’s, but at least I’m eating! It’s now 4AM already, and I really have GOT to go to bed, because I am thoroughly exhausted. Tomorrow it’s back to Eataly, and I will be working for the next seven days straight, which is gonna be… fun. Seriously though, I hope things start picking up for me soon. I’m tired of just waiting around, waiting for something to happen. I need the opportunity to arise, because when it does I am going to CRUSH it. Seriously though, I love theater and I cannot wait to start being able to make acting my full time job. I just need to get in the door.
Until next time,