The Path to Mending a Broken Heart: Day 8- All Work and No Play Would Make Me Go Insane (5/10/19)

So today I had off from work. Normally that would mean that I actually get to sleep in for once, but the grind never stops, because I still had to wake up early so I could head back to Green Olive for the food prep class. Of course I ended up leaving later than I would have preferred, and ended up arriving 15 minutes late. Of course when I am let in and pay the woman I talked to previously, she tells me that the class is actually taking place in a separate location, so I had to leave, get back on a train, and head to Brooklyn for the class. The rough part of this was the fact that I brought my umbrella with me today, because it’s supposed to be raining out today, and surprise surprise- I left it at the building, so fuck me. Also I found out that I wasn’t paid for one day I worked last week, so now I have to deal with that, which is ALWAYS a pleasure. Not a great start to my day, but it is what it is.

I finally make it to the classroom, probably a solid 45 minutes to an hour late, to find a room with 5 or 6 people inside sitting around a round table. There was an older man with a heavier accent teaching the class, and he seemed to sort of mock me for being late. Luckily they had barely started yet, so I really didn’t miss much. Even better was the fact that another person arrived even later than me, so I wasn’t even the last person to show up! Now the class lasted until 3PM, and we were basically just going over a 15 page packet and underlining what is going to be on the test. However, between the pages, our instructor would continuously go on weird tangents, whether it was about how US foods are bad for you because chemicals, to the fact that those chemicals are the reason people in the US have cancer, to the fact that he drinks water with apple cider vinegar every morning to cleanse his system. Honestly a very strange man, but we made it out of the class with no issues, so that’s a good thing.

I made my way home for a few hours, just to relax and get something in my stomach, since all I had eaten this morning was some granola bars; not the best thing to fill you up. I made myself two peanut butter jelly sandwiches on rice cakes, along with some delicious pickles, and chowed down as I watched some Youtube. As the time reached 6PM, I know I wanted to make my way back downtown for team night with DialogueDirect at Sing-Sing, which is a karaoke bar. I ended up arriving around 7:20 and  greeted Edwin and a few others that were up front ordering drinks. Edwin said that drinks were on him, so I grabbed myself a tequila shot and a tequila sunrise, and made my way downstairs to our room. When I got in, I didn’t see anyone I was close enough with to talk to, so I just hung in a corner and watched everyone have fun and sing. I mean I sang from a distance, but didn’t really get into the action. Dialogue is definitely a very close knit family, but I am just not great in situations where there are a bunch of people I don’t know. I don’t really show off my true self, instead I shut down and stay to myself. Now it’s not a good thing, but I’ve really done it my entire life. There was a bunch of pizza though, so of course I grabbed a few slices. (Free dinner! Wooooo) As the night went on, I grabbed myself another tequila sunrise and took another tequila shot, this time with Edwin and a fundraiser, who just became a site rep. (aka they can now train people) As the night came to a close, one Dialoguer’s girlfriend who came through earlier in the night decided to sing Satisfied from Hamilton, and I instantly perked up, because of course I did. After Satisfied, My Shot was played and I had to get in on the action. Someone handed me a mic and I started going hard on Hamilton’s rap, messing up a bit at the beginning and falling apart at the end because everyone left, but damn was it a workout. I was out of breath as hell after that song. After that, Somebody I Used to Know started, and I joined in singing that because, well another classic song.

By the time Somebody I Used to Know ended, most people had parted ways to go to another bar, so I just quickly went to the bathroom, thanked Edwin for the fun team night, and made my way back to the train and back home. Now tequila seems to make me a bit emotional, because I got on my phone and for some idiotic reason I looked at some pictures of W on my phone. I escalated this when I got home by reading some of the letters she wrote to me over the past few months. Nothing insane, but it definitely still hit me. It’s still so crazy to me how much of an impact she has on my life, even though I’ve known her since the end of last November. Like I haven’t even known this girl for half a year yet and she’s already got me emotionally unraveling. Well, sort of. The days are starting to get better now, and though I do have weak points like I did tonight, I’m still trucking along. I will say that I am stressed still, but that’s more-so now from dealing with bullshit in the rest of my life, because whoever’s out there is really trying to screw me over I guess. Either way, tomorrow’s a new day; time for some sleep.

Until next time,


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