Today I rolled out of bed around 12 or 1PM– Like every Monday, it’s my day off, so I am going to relax as much as I can. I of course a few hours after I got up playing League, because it consumes my free time. But after getting tilted from losing a few games, I decided to take a break, make some lunch, and get some actual work done. When I met with my voice instructor about 2 weeks ago, he told me to start looking for some new material for my audition book. Even though the songs I had in there weren’t bad by any means, I definitely needed to expand my horizons. So of course after hearing that, I put it out of sight and out of mind until today, because procrastination is a bitch. So anyway, I began looking for songs that could work. I began with the obvious for me– Be More Chill. The main character fits my type perfectly, so I grabbed the opening number, and figured out two different cuts for it. I then began to do some research into what characters I could play right now. I doubt I’ll be ever to easily be cast as the Beast in Beauty and the Beast, because who would ever be intimidated of a skinny, lanky white guy. But I can play nerdier characters, like Jeremy from Be More Chill, and Seymour from Little Shop of Horrors. So I used those as my starting point and started digging. I looked into what other roles those actors had played, and tried to work off of that, to some moderate success.
After a bit of digging, I fell down the hole that is 54 Below. I fantastic venue where actors sing many different types of musical theater songs, some from shows and some not from shows. It’s definitely a good place to get some material that will seem fresh and not overused, like if someone came in and said “Hi! I’m going to audition using the song Defying Gravity from Wicked”. Which, for the love of god, NEVER do. That is audition suicide. I ended up stumbling on a few good songs even! Their definitely not things I can use right away, and I need practice with, but at least I found a starting place. Tomorrow I have my voice lesson, and then I go in for the audition on Wednesday for a Showcase. I’m excited and nervous, because I really want to find an Agent, and fast.
I mean, don’t get me wrong, I am happy to finally be in New York City, and post-grad is not a competition, but I have a friend in South Korea teaching English, I have a friend who is heading to England tomorrow for grad school, I have a friend in Florida for the Disney program, and I just found out one of my other friends just booked a national tour, thanks to the agent he got from my school’s showcase back in May. Aka I feel like I’m lagging behind, even though I know I’m not. I know that I’m doing well– I’m not living at home, I’m living on my own, I live in New York, and I have a full time job in which I am paying rent with. But I have this hunger for more. And I think that is incredibly important to have, because without that hunger, you won’t have the courage to chase your dreams. But god damn do I want it. Maybe I sound like the hundreds of thousands of actors in NYC, saying that they want to make it. Maybe I’m not special, but I don’t care. I am not going to give up. I will be successful and I will make it. Why? Because I am competitive as FUCK and I am not going to let anyone beat me. Some people have it easier than others. Some people are just luckier. But none of that matters. I am going to put in the work and effort, and I will find an Agent. It just sucks right now, and I have to just keep pushing through until I finally make it. It’s almost 4AM and I have my lesson at 2PM, so I am going to get some sleep. Life is scary because the future has yet to be written. All I can do is try and do all that I can so that I can write my own future, and have it be a successful one. And as always, thank you to everyone and anyone who reads this. Who knows, maybe you’ll be able to see me one day soon at 54 Below, singing one of those new songs. I guess you’ll just have to wait and find out.
Until next time,